How Do You Define Yourself?

Last night, Mom and I went to Wal-Mart because I needed some shorts for this summer – aka, Florida this week. I have lost a good bit of weight since the summer of 2012, and while I’m super proud of how far I’ve come, there are still days when I’m not sure that I’m 100% happy with myself.

PicMonkey Collage

Let’s get right down to it – I hate looking for clothes. Nothing is ever the same size from store to store – and even sometimes things vary in the SAME store – and nothing ever fits the way that I want it to. 

So, when I went shopping last night, I knew what I was looking for – a certain size in a certain department. I went there, grabbed a bunch of shorts and capris and headed straight to the dressing room where I was sure I’d find plenty of things.

Only, to my dismay…nothing fit. 

And then, nothing fit in the next size up, either. They wouldn’t come up past my thighs that, although a decent size, really aren’t that big.


Okay, so it was away from the junior’s department for me. After almost shedding some tears of clothes that didn’t fit, I went to the lady’s department, grabbed a few more pairs of pants in what I considered my size, and went back to the dressing room for round 2. 

Round 2 is never as good as round 1 ’cause I’ve already been discouraged by the clothes I tried on. But this time, it went quite well. The things fit, and this time I wanted to cry for joy instead of depression over clothes that didn’t fit.

The moral of the story is, you can’t define yourself by the number on the tag in your pants. That’s not going to tell you who you are, or how special you are.

The same way as the scale isn’t going to tell you how beautiful or awesome you are. 

Don’t judge yourself by either of these things – but instead by how you’ve changed from yesterday to today. Or from last year to this year.

God made us just the way we are supposed to be – and we need to accept ourselves as that. We are imperfect human beings, but we are his, and He made us in His image.

Remember that today – and tomorrow – and the next day – as you face dressing rooms, and girls smaller than you, and women on tv who look anorexic and you wonder why you can’t be like them. 

You are God’s, and you are special. 

 For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.

~Psalm 139:13-14

  • Heather McDonald

    Excellent post, Ashley! I too struggle with finding clothes that fit, but for me it’s a post-baby body that gets me down. Last fall I got fed up with NONE of my jr’s size large t-shirts fitting, so I went to the ladies department at the same store and found some that fit. The size? Extra small. It just makes me shake my head. No wonder there are so many teenagers with eating disorders and other body image related issues! I’ve still got plenty of weight to lose, but now my goal isn’t a specific number, but rather a point when I look in the mirror and like what I see. And a lot of that has more to do with my eyes than my thighs!!